there's nothing wrong with using tell and ask
i'm not particularly good at this section of snap either, but what i usually do with multiple sprites/clones is
sandbox scripts to let them run ahead and see what happens (this is part of the reason why i keep talking about lambda environments, i want to do more of this)
have seperate things that don't need any communication, or very little communication where all that's needed is a broadcast or such
use a bunch of clones that run their own scripts, but are all managed by the parent (like scrolling notes in a rhythm game), sometimes even clones of clones to get a nice tree structure of elements
there are already much more clever uses i could think of, but it can get very complicated.
also considering some of the questions you're asking, have you read the manual?
no, the clones are easier. clones can be made to run their own independent scripts without worrying about ways to make scripts synchronous. pen doesn't give any advantages.
i'm a bit suspicious that you like what you're calling "javascript style" because you know what it is, not because it's actually better.
even javascript has async functions, which does the exact same threading behavior as snap.
sprites have a lot more than position, and you just said yourself ASK lets you communicate between sprites. why would you even need anything else?
i use parallelization in a ton of my javascript and it works just fine. tons of web technologies are built around parallelization to make things faster and often easier.
sorry if it got buried underneath all that mess, i mentioned before
if those are unclear, by the first i mean every time a sprite draws with the pen, it should use (pen trails) to take whatever it did as a costume (switch to costume, save to a variable, etc), then clear the pen for other things to use.
the other just means get one big pen drawing sprite that does all the pen, and other sprites can tell it what it needs to do